Preparing Baby for Daycare

Transitioning a baby to daycare doesn't begin when you hand your infant off on the first day to your provider. It starts waaaaay before then. 

For your peace of mind, your child care provider's ability to provide quality care, and your infant's emotional and physical comfort, there are several things that need to be accomplished long before that first day of child care.

For a successful transition:

• Baby must be bottle trained
• Baby must be able to nap well in the crib or pack-n-play your provider uses
• Baby must be used to safe sleep practices
• Baby must be able to fall asleep on own
• Baby must be able to spend time not being held
• Baby should be able to self-soothe to some degree by 4 months

It is very easy while on maternity leave, especially with your first child, to breast feed exclusively, hold your baby all the time, let your baby fall asleep on the breast, and hold your baby while sleeping. You want that closeness and to spend as much time as possible with your infant. 

Unfortunately, all these things set your infant up for having a very rough transition to a daycare situation, and possibly the loss of your daycare position. Even if you have a wonderful and attentive provider, they have other children to take care of as well. Lunch must be made, diapers changed, altercations mediated, learning taught. One infant can not consume 100% of a provider's time and attention. 

A parent and infant that expects or demands that, will need to find a provider willing and able to accommodate those needs. Since sleep practices are regulated by licensing, that can mean needing an in-home nanny who is not under the same regulations, or an illegal provider. A quality licensed provider will not be placing an infant at risk, even at the parent's request.

BOTTLE TRAINING

The earlier you introduce the bottle, the better the result. As soon as good breastfeeding is established, the introduction of a bottle a few times a week will help your infant transition to day bottle feeding during child care much easier. Introduction just a few days or even weeks prior to going into daycare, will be a struggle. I currently have a 15 week baby that took more than 3 weeks of daily 3 bottles a day training to even BEGIN to take the bottle with any level of success. She was exclusively breastfed while mom was home. She had never had a bottle and refused that plastic nipple even being near her mouth. Quite vocally. Starting earlier is easier. For everyone, including your baby. 

Baby should be taking a bottle on the same schedule as they will at daycare, at minimum, the last two weeks before transitioning into care. If there will be no option for you to come breast feed, there shouldn't be any option of that at home those last two weeks, either. 

Even if you plan to breastfeed every feeding at your child care provider's, your baby should still be bottle trained unless you can GUARANTEE that you will be able to make those feedings. No meetings that go over, no late phone calls, no car accidents or bad traffic in your commute, etc. You can't leave a hungry baby screaming with your provider with no way for them to accommodate your child's needs. 

Keep in mind that exclusive breastfeeding also means your baby will have a very difficult time if you get sick or in an accident, they get sick and need to go into a hospital, you want to go out for an evening or go away for a weekend, you need to take certain medications if you get sick, or would like to have alcohol every once in a while and be able to pump-and-dump for 24 hours afterward. 

Very few infants have "nipple confusion" after breastfeeding is established at about the 4 week mark. They want their mom connection and the taste and feel of the breast, and will go between bottle and breast with little fuss once trained. 

Once baby is old enough to have an opinion, it can be difficult to bottle train. There are some tricks:

• Provide a nipple that mimics mom's breast and nipple size OR
• Provide a nipple that is similar to their pacifier if they use one
• As with a binky, begin by just having them play with it in the mouth
• Have dad or someone else give the bottle
• Give the bottle in a position other than the one for breastfeeding
• Give the bottle when you know baby is hungry
• Try holding a shirt or blanket with mom's smell next to baby's head
• If baby refuses to take breastmilk from a bottle, try formula. If formula works, gradually mix it with breastmilk in increasing quantities until baby is back to taking breastmilk exclusively.
• Make sure bottle is warm enough, it needs to be body temperature

What causes problems: 

• Not starting early
• Not starting early enough to have it completed in time for care
• Liking that baby only wants mom, not fair to baby
• Not pumping prior to care to know how much can be produced and creating a back up supply of frozen breast milk
• Assuming baby will take a bottle from the provider, in a new environment with new sights, sounds, smells and people, when baby is already stressed from starting at a new place

Most providers require infants to be bottle trained prior to starting care.

HOLDING

I hold my infants to 4 months as much as possible. I have a lot of experience and am able to do almost everything with an infant in my arms. When not in my arms, the infant is in their carrier, pack-n-play or bouncer right next to me. I am able to talk and interact with the baby at all times. However, I can't hold them the entire time. They must be okay with the separation and just being close, seeing my face and hearing my voice.

 

Your baby needs tummy time and to spend time near, but off, of you. Holding an infant 24/7 is fine for the first weeks, but they need to build the muscles for rolling and that takes time down on the floor. They need to know that not being held is not being abandoned and to be okay with it.

Over 5 months, a baby should be on the floor most of the time. Spending time on the floor with a constantly changing variety of toys and sensory items is what builds physical strength, proprioception sense, vestibular balance, crossing-the-midline ability, cognitive connections, resiliency, cause/effect understanding, visual acuity, and so many more developmental markers. Being held, sitting in a stationary exersaucer, and using any other contraption that holds an infant in a fixed position is detrimental to their growth and development. It is vitally important for their physical, mental, emotional and cognitive growth that they be allowed to spend time alone on the floor exploring and moving. 

What causes problems:

• Hold 24/7
• Expect provider to do the same
• Expect baby to be okay with not being held exclusively once in care, even though they are not okay with it at home [we are not magicians]
• Not providing tummy time and other physical growth opportunities so that once in care, baby is not developmentally able to perform at an age-appropriate level

SLEEPING

Legally, providers must practice safe sleep practices. Infants must be placed on their backs in a pack-n-play or crib to sleep with nothing more than a plain pacifier. Period. Sleeping in a carrier, bouncer, baby hammock or even in the arms can place the infant in danger of positional asphyxiation. 

If a baby is allowed to sleep on a parent's chest, laying face down for naps, the transition to care is going to be VERY difficult. You've got a level of warmth, heart beat sound, face-down position, smell and body feel all to overcome before the infant can sleep in a daycare situation. This is SO far outside of how the infant will need to be taking naps at daycare, that it is very difficult to overcome once this becomes the baby's norm. 

NOOOOooooo!

Establishing your care situation as early as possible, you can find out if your future provider will be using a crib or pack-n-play, which music or white noise they use, level of light in the nap area, etc. so that you can mimic those factors as early as possible to get your infant comfortable with how they will be sleeping in care.

We often can't take the time to rock them to sleep, and we can't allow them to fall asleep on the bottle. We need to be able to place them in their crib or pack-n-play, on their back, and have them go to sleep with reassurance and soft touches.

Even the most chill daycare will have crying babies, screaming toddler drama, bickering preschoolers. Add in some banging, music, chatter, etc. and daycare is NOT a quiet place. Infants, especially for morning nap, must be able to sleep through noise. Putting them down in a quiet room by themselves all the time is setting them up for sleep problems at daycare. At minimum, have music or TV playing while they sleep in the morning and go about your regular activities. My infants sleep through the vacuum, dogs barking and all the other noises that go on here.  

What causes problems:

• Letting baby fall asleep on the breast or bottle 
• Holding baby in any manner while sleeping
• Not putting baby to sleep in a crib or pack-n-play as will be required at daycare, especially for naps, while at home
• Not practicing safe sleep practices/back-2-sleep
• Swaddling beyond 2 months when daycare can't
• Using a white noise your provider can't replicate
• Using a Wubbanub, blanket, or other lovey for sleep time that can't be used at daycare for sleep
• Having baby sleep in a quiet environment

SELF-SOOTHING

Parents, especially new parents, are quick to pick up and soothe at every peep their infant makes. Soothing is not at all bad, but when infants associate any little discomfort or irritation with being held, cuddled, rocked, cooed and entertained, it doesn't allow the natural progression of self-soothing. "Babies who can self-soothe sleep for longer periods and have longer total sleep times at night." Infants should begin to learn to self-soothe at 3-4 months and a 6 month old should have the ability.

A child care provider may be dealing with another child when baby starts to fuss, and unless the infant is in emotional distress, the infant may have to wait their turn.

Helping with self soothing:

• Give the opportunity for your infant to self-soothe by not immediately jumping in to "fix" the situation
• Watch for self-soothing behavior and only step in if the baby seems to be escalating in need for assistance
• If necessary, soothe with sounds, words and soothing touch [gentle pats, back rub] rather than holding, rocking  and full physical contact when possible

What causes problems:

• Respond with soothing to every little peep their infant makes
• Soothing with breast/bottle feeding
• Soothing immediately with picking up rather than sounds, words or touch first

SCHEDULE

I've seen mom blogs say that you need to get your baby on a schedule before they go into care. I disagree. A good provider is aware of developmentally appropriate practice and one of those practices is that infants are allowed to eat and sleep on demand. Especially until 6 months. At 6 months babies generally navigate into a regular schedule. However, this will always be at the whim of teething, gas, growth phases, changes in family schedule, any time away from parents or in a new environment, changes to routine, etc. Never get complacent with an infant schedule. As soon as you do, it will change.

The rhythms of a daycare setting are very different from the ones at home, and while a general schedule of morning nap, eating every 2-3 hours and afternoon nap are in play, schedules are never meant to be rigid for infants. Even older children often have different sleep needs when in a growth phase. I had a 5 year old who hadn't napped in a year suddenly start needing one when he took a massive growth spurt of an inch in a month. Your provider will want to know what the general schedule has been at home will try to accomodate that to some extent. More so, the provider will look to your baby for cues of hunger and tiredness and respond accordingly. 

Forcing your infant to stay up, go hungry, or pushing your baby to eat when it is full, is not appropriate. Babies need what they need when they need it. 

CONCLUSION

When all of these things are in place, your infant and provider can focus on building an emotional bond, a trust bond. Your infant can focus on becoming familiar and comfortable with the new environment in a state of being well rested with a full tummy. Having those basic needs met with little to no issue, will make the transition a MUCH easier one, on your baby, your provider, and YOU.

When in doubt, ask yourself, "Would I be doing this if I had six children?" 

If your answer is no, and you plan for your baby to go into daycare, then your parenting should, at least most of the time, help your baby prepare for a child care setting.

Cloth Diapers & Child Care

I hope you enjoyed Jessica's guest post on Cloth Diaper Ins and Outs. This is a follow up from a child care provider's perspective.

TIPS & TRICKS

In general, cloth diapers are pretty much the same as disposables. Same general routine and diapering procedures. There are a few things I keep in mind, however.

I have to store the diapers and liners. Yes you have to store disposables as well, but those stack up neatly or are in plastic sleeves. For cloth, I use an IKEA plastic bin that stores the diapers and a roll of liners. I take the diapers out each morning and place them into the bin and hang the wet bag on the bathroom door.

I can't wipe with a cloth diaper the same as with a disposable. Most poop can be wiped off with a disposable, but if you do that with a cloth diaper, you get more poop on it than necessary, which you don't want. I keep a roll of toilet paper handy and will use that to remove the majority of the mess prior to using wipes. Otherwise, you will use a dozen plus wipes. I just plop the toilet paper into the toilet, since I change them on a pad on the floor of the bathroom. [State likes for the bathroom stuff to all be in the bathroom, and a pad on the floor saves my back from lifting 2 year olds.]

I need to think more about changing order. I change all of them at the same time, usually. If using gloves, it doesn't really matter, but I don't. I use a plastic bag for the nasties. I turn it inside out to grab the soiled liner off the cloth diaper, so I need to do the cloth diaper child first. Then I do the others and put the soiled disposables into the same bag.

I need to prepare the diaper before taking the other one off. This is basically true of disposables as well. However, pulling a liner off the roll requires two hands. laying out the diaper requires two hands, getting the snaps together takes two hands. If you have squirmy child, things can get messy fast. I always lay out the diaper with liner on top prior to laying the child down on the pad. I can put a disposable on one handed while holding a child in place, not so with a cloth diaper.

I need to be considerate of the parents and place very poopy diapers into a plastic bag. This lets them know that it will need additional attention and not just be tossed into the laundry. The plastic bag goes into the wet bag.

I need to keep in mind that it is against state regulations for me to do any more with a soiled diaper than is absolutely necessary. I can't pull out absorbency inserts, wash out poop, or do anything that could increase contamination of the space.

The parents have to bring the diapers daily. We start out the week with 5. Usually I use 3-4 a day at this point, 20 months old, depending on how late nap goes. They take the soiled ones each evening and bring me a corresponding amount back the next morning in a clean wet bag. I keep one spare in his clothes cubby and have a few disposables as back up.

The parents have to supply diaper rash cream. Most creams will lower the absorbency of the cloth diapers, so they are required to provide one appropriate for the diapers.

MY FAVORITES & NOT SO FAVORITES

Wet Bags: My favorites are the Kanga Care wet bags. They are about three times as roomy as the envelope style. It is SOOOO much easier to get soiled diapers into it. It can hold a days worth easy, along with any soiled clothing. The envelope styles barely hold a days worth of soiled diapers, and it can get messy trying to stuff them into the smaller opening. I would love to have a Kanga Care one for every child, especially when we have wet swimsuits in the summer. 

There's just really no comparison. I'm always happier to see the Kanga Care bags.

Diapers: My favorite, especially for boys, is Bum Genius. Each diaper brand has a different liner/insert configuration. Some have one long liner that is doubled over, some have snap in liners, some have a single pocket liner, etc. Bum Genius have full reach dual pockets, one on each side. What I like about this is that with inserts, you can double the absorbency as they grow older. For boys, I can double up the front liner at nap, when they are usually sleeping on their stomachs over 18 months, and are more likely to pee out because of it, giving me 3 layers of absorbency even without inserts.

I DO NOT LIKE AT ALL the GroVia brand. They are so much narrower than the other brands and they snap front to back rather than back to front like disposables. The liners are much more narrow, and they have the single doubled over liner, Since I've been using disposables for over 30 years, the backwards snapping alone drives me nuts. It's just...WRONG and irritates me that I have to think while changing a child's diaper, which is one of the most mindless tasks, and a time when I should be spending engaging with the child rather than being forced to THINK about what I'm doing. GroVia is on the right.

I am also not a fan of a coop/no-name brand that has a dark gray inside. They are the only ones I have had two pee-outs from. I no longer use them at nap time. Ever. 

Some more personal opinions: Happy Heiny has only a single liner, but is super absorbent. Smart Bottoms don't seem to hold enough pee for bigger kids. Blueberry Diapers are fine. 

Jessica has mentioned that the ones with the Velcro rather than snaps are easier for the little ones to get open, but that Velcro is pretty darn strong, and I don't mind it at all. I can see where it would be a problem if the diapers were washed with other linty clothing, but I don't mind them. Quick and easy rather than trying to align snaps. They are not as adjustable, so I would imagine the cost would be higher since they would only fit a more limited size range.  

Frankly, the only irritation with cloth diapers has been the GroVia brand of diapers. Otherwise, I have had no issues with using the cloth diapers whatsoever. 

I was very surprised that indeed, he has less diaper rash issues than the ones in disposables. These new "cloth" diapers have great absorbency and the PLO outer fabric holds everything in wonderfully. 

I would HIGHLY recommend them to parents. Providers, cloth diapers are really a non-issue. Cloth friendly is a great marketing tool that costs you nothing. Being cloth friendly is easy peasy. 

They can be expensive to start out with, but you can always make your own! Additional cloth diaper pins on my Baby Crafts Pinterest pinboard.


Follow Little Stars Learning's board Baby Crafts on Pinterest.

Cloth Diaper Ins and Outs

While I knew they had changed, when I first saw one of the new ones, my reaction was, "Well isn't this slick!" While they are called "cloth diapers," they have SO much more to them than the old fashioned white ones.

My client, Jessica Nollett, has kindly created the following guest blog post to discuss the ins and outs of cloth diapering.

I have added my 2 cents into a follow-up post from a provider's perspective Cloth Diapers & Child Care. [I have my favorites, too! Along with some tips.]

YES, WE CLOTH DIAPER

That look when you tell someone you cloth diaper your child. It’s often one of horror/disbelief, that is quickly covered up by the fakest smile you can imagine, and then followed by comments like “the poop is too much for me,” “just wait till he is older; your tune will change,” or an ominous “Hmmmm.”

Those interactions humor us at this point. My husband and I made the decision together to cloth diaper our children long before our son was born. It wasn’t just because of the environment or the cost savings, but was almost a ‘why wouldn’t we cloth our kids’ thought. From all of our research, we found out we would be saving money if we cloth diapered more than one child (it’s a breakeven on one), and we do care about the environment, but there were other things that we liked: 

• cloth diaper kids are easier to potty train
• they tend to potty train sooner
• diaper rash isn’t as bad with cloth diapers, 
• and frankly, tell me that a disposable is cuter than this!

If you haven’t seen a cloth diaper like this, let me quickly get you up to speed. Cloth diapers these days are innovative, adorable, and nothing like what they once were. They used to be what you used if you couldn’t afford disposable. Now, they are much more expensive upfront, but you can save over time. The stigma has changed from poor people cloth to rich hippies cloth. 

They are constructed of a PUL (polyurethane laminate) coated fabric shell with snaps or Velcro (hook and loop) that are adjustable in rise (up/down) and waist. On the inside, there is either bamboo, cotton, hemp, or a microfiber system of pads and fabric to absorb everything. On the back of the diaper and leg holes, there are elastic gussets to keep everything inside the diaper. 

THE INs and OUTs

OUR STASH

1) Diapers:

The diapers that work best for our situation are the All-In-Ones (AIO). This means that the absorbent pad is ATTACHED to the rest of the diaper. We do have a decent collection of Pocket Diapers (there is a pocket that you stash the pad into), but it’s a hassle for daycare. At home, we pull that pad out of the pocket after use, but daycares can’t legally do that, so you are left digging through your wet bag, touching wet and dirty diapers. Gross. (Warning: AIO diapers are more expensive, but worth it for us). Some of my favorite brands are Bum Genius, Smart Bottoms, GroVia, Thirsties, and Blueberry. 

When diaper shopping, I prefer diapers that are also one size fits most; they are bulky on your baby at first, but become more trim fitting as your child gets older. If money is a factor, I strongly suggest looking at the big picture, and realize if your child wears a diaper 2x per week for 100 weeks, $20 for that diaper is no big deal, BUT there are online coops where you can buy off-brand diapers for less. We have found they aren’t as great as my favorite brands, but they get the job done.

2) Pail:

We use a Dekor diaper pail, and it does a good job. A fancier option is the Ubbi. Both brands offer wet bags if you choose to cloth diaper. Be sure to get two wet bags for the pail, that way one can be in the wash. We also have a regular trash can with a lid/peddle for the wipes.

3) Wet bags:

These are the bags that are lined with a polyurethane laminate (that is also used on the diapers) and are where the diapers are placed after use. We have about 5 of these, and send them daily to daycare full of clean diapers, and the dirty diapers are sent home in the same bag at the end of the day. Wet bags are also great for swimsuits.

4) Liners:

When babies are exclusively breastfed, diapers can be tossed into the washer, poop and all. Once food is introduced, majority of the poop needs to be removed from the diaper before washing. There are lots of ways to do this, but we use flushable liners. They catch the poop, and can be tossed in the toilet with the poop.

5) Rash Creams/Sprays:

Regular rash creams will RUIN the absorbency of your cloth diapers, but there are great alternatives that can be used. Grandma El’s offers a great one for a bad diaper rash, but my favorite is CJ’s Butter (I use the spritz). I like it the best, because it is not just for diaper rash, but can be used for dry skin, bug bites, sun burns, etc.

OUR ROUTINE

Our son (17 months) wears cloth diapers during the day every day (home and daycare), but wears a disposable at night, if we are out and about, and when we are out of town. And honestly, we could do cloth for the last two, but we are lazy. We have a “stash” of 30 diapers, only really use 16-18 of them (because we definitely have favorites), and do a diaper load of laundry 2x per week. As he has gotten older, we use less diapers per day, but definitely need more absorbency than before. When he was younger, we were doing laundry every other day, and then 3x per week after that.

The hardest part about cloth diapering is the laundry. It’s not that it’s difficult, it just takes time, and lots of rinse cycles. While there are special cloth diaper detergents, most people prefer regular powder Tide, and less is more. Too much detergent can affect the absorbency. How you do it: pre-rinse your diapers, wash with detergent, rinse again, and then dry. To speed up drying, invest in wool dryer balls. They are amazing for all of your laundry.

TIPS ON GETTING INTO CLOTH

1) Take a class. We found that our local cloth diaper store (Itsy Bitsy Bums) offered a class on cloth diapering and explained all of the ins and outs of it, for free!

2) Register for diapers. This was great! We got some adorable prints and our friends had fun picking them out.

3) Look for a newborn rental program. Newborn diapers are smaller and are outgrown quickly, so they are not worth the investment. Itsy Bitsy Bums offers a great rental program for the first 12 weeks, for $200, and if you return them for $160 store credit, you can buy lots of cute diapers. You also have the option to return for cash/credit and get $100 back.

4) Build slowly and based on your needs. Your preferences may change and the speed at which your baby goes through diapers will change, so no need to get them all right away.

Box = Learning

I still say that a box is one of the MOST important elements in early childhood learning. Not only does it promote large motor development, it presents so many additional learning opportunities. 

Mr. L is 11 1/2 months old.

This is a few pictures in a single day.

Risk Assessment

Sometimes he just likes to hang out like this. 

• Analysis
• Logic/Reasoning
• Handling Frustration
• Thinking Outside of the Box [lol]
• Perseverance

It's easier to get in on the low side. 

He's learning that.

Cause/Effect

Rocking a little too hard while sitting inside.

• Dramatic Play
• Imaginative Resourcing

Sitting, hiding. Popping up and down.

• Positional Location
• Climbing Coordination
• Volume and Measure
• Height and Depth Assessment

Climbing and surfing, sitting and laying on top. 

He hasn't gotten the nerve to stand on top yet. 

I'm waiting.

Notice the dinosaur hidden inside.

"[L]! Are you ON your box?

Where's your dino? Is it INSIDE your box?" 

• Force
• Offsetting Forces
• Work
• Coordination
• Balance
• Strength Training

Carrying it all over.

Pretty heavy box for such a little guy.

That doesn't hinder him in ANY way.

•  Physics

Putting it off-balance so that he can rock it like a maniac.

But yes, it's all gross motor. 

And tiring.

Tags: box, gross motor, boy, girl, infant, toddler, daycare, child care, learning, education, homeschool, early childhood education, ECE, DAP, Reggio

Rotating Infant and Toddler Toy Bins

Since toys must be sanitized daily for children under 18 months in my state, and I often do not have time to do this in the evenings, I took a tip from my brother and incorporated the 5 bin system.

I have 5 STURDY laundry baskets, one for each day of the week. If I don't have time, then I can wait and sanitize all of the toys on the weekend or in one evening. 

Additionally, since this age group mostly wants to throw and dump, it keeps the quantity of items to a manageable level. By rotating daily, they have fresh items to explore on a daily basis, keeping the focus more on the cognitive exploration that can get lost with a non-dynamic environment at this age.

In each of these bins, I include at least one:

• Baby doll
• Ball
• Bead chaser
• Blanket
• Blocks
• Car
• Container for fill/dump
• Dress up items
• Mirror
• Movement toy
• Musical instrument/rattle
• Plastic animals
• Play dishes/food
• Play phone
• Puzzle
• Sensory item
• Soft or board book
• Stacker
• Stuffed animal

The laundry basket is an additional gross motor play element, so I spent the extra money for heavier ones. They sit on and in it, climb on it, fill and dump, use it as a table, etc. 

Since my infants and young toddlers have their own large sanitized play area, having their own sanitized toys ensures that they are only sharing germs with one another and only on a daily basis.

While I'm not big on over sanitizing for children, it does become super important when the environment has been exposed to an illness through a sick child or parent, or if flu or another contagious illness is rampant in the community. Very young children can die from illnesses that cause older ones to only be sick for a short time. 

Plus, it is required by regulations, so I have to do it.

As they get older, I can manipulate items in the bins to incorporate skill sets. For instance, if we will be working on the color red, I can make certain that there are a number of red items included in the bin. If we will be working on the number 3, I can include 3 of several items. For the letter B, I can have items that represent that letter.

There is another reason besides laziness/time that I like to clean and sanitize a few day's or the week's worth of toys at once. When clean, I take the jumble of items and sort them into the baskets available according to the master list. This ensures that the items, while the same, are grouped into different combinations within the baskets each time. This allows for new explorations of materials with one another.

I do label the bins. I print out the days of the week and laminate them, punch holes, and use zip ties to attach, cutting the zip ties close to the closure with wire cutters. Do these labels stay on forever? Absolutely not! But getting them off is another motor and cognitive activity, and does take an extended period of time if they are laminated. The zip ties, however, will stay on, so they do not have the potential to become a choking hazard, as any other attempt at labeling would become. The holes can be additionally enforced with a second layer of lamination.

Tags: infant, toddler, homeschool, homeschooling, preschool, child care, daycare, child, care, business, organization, health, wellness, sickness, illness, skills, development, cognitive, motor, fine motor, gross motor, 

Crib [or family bed] to Bed Transition

Toddlers are capable of climbing out of cribs as early as 13 months! I caught a little boy this age as he dove head first over the side of a crib. I haven't had cribs in my child care since then, only pack-n-plays, which are deeper and have soft sides they have more trouble getting a firm foothold upon. 

I also currently have a toddler who was easily climbing out of a pack-n-play prior to 18 months. She is a limber and STRONG little bitty child who could hook her foot up over the top and pull herself over with no issue WAY too early. She still can, this is for demonstration purposes of her technique. She couldn't even get her arm over the top when she first climbed out. She's been out on a bed for a good while now.

Little Monkey Miss N at 21 months

Some state regulations require children in child care settings to be removed from cribs and pack-n-plays at EXACTLY 18 months. There are reasons for this mandate. 

I have had parents tell me that they want to keep their child in the crib as long as possible so that the child is basically caged, i.e. SAFE while alone in the nursery. However, this is definitely NOT the case. A toddler tumbling from a crib can be deadly, and a monitor can't tell you something's wrong if the child can't cry to get your attention. 

THURSDAY, Feb. 17 (HealthDay News) -- Each year in the United States, nearly 10,000 children under the age of 2 arrive in emergency rooms with injuries suffered while in cribs, playpens and bassinets, a new report shows.

Most of these injuries involve cribs and are usually caused by kids climbing out and falling on the floor, said the researchers from Nationwide Children's Hospital in Columbus, Ohio.

"The most surprising thing to me was the number of crib-related injuries we found being treated in hospital emergency departments," said lead researcher Dr. Gary A Smith, a professor of pediatrics and director of the hospital's Center for Injury Research and Policy.

"This is an underestimate," he said. "We know that children are taken to their private physician and urgent care centers."

Smith noted that only about 1 percent of the injuries involved a parent or sibling: "It appears that most of these falls are children climbing out of the crib and falling."

In most cases, the children landed head first, Smith noted, which "really makes this an issue that we should pay attention to." Children at that age are top-heavy, so when they fall they fall head first and don't have the ability to break their fall these injuries can be serious, he explained.

Smith added that as the children became more mobile, the number of injuries increased. "So, parents need to be cautious when a child is in a crib and can start to pull himself up," Smith said. READ MORE

What I have suggested to my clients that has worked well: 

• Remove the crib, place the crib mattress on the floor. The crib mattress is comfortable and familiar and will sleep/feel/smell the same once it's on the floor. Transitioning to a different mattress, bedding, bed position in the room, etc. is just asking to stimulate your child and cause issues. If the bed is the same, just lower with no bars, then your child has only one change to handle. Children do best with consistency and routine, and too many changes thrown at once can be disturbing to them.

• Place a gate over the bedroom doorway so your child can be heard but not roam the house. 

• Keep only a few toys down and accessible to your child in the bedroom. When your child goes to sleep, the toys are locked in the closet or placed into a bin and removed to another room or the hallway so if s/he wakes up, there's no reason to not go back to sleep, no stimulation. The room basically becomes a large pack-n-play. It also removes any boosters for getting over the gate.

Miss H 18 months

Falling out of bed 3-4 inches onto the floor isn't going to hurt a child. As they gain spatial awareness of their non-restricted environment, falling out of bed is normal. Eventually their body will accustom and adjust naturally to ensure that doesn't happen. A child jumping on a crib mattress on the floor is also not likely to break a bone, or cause them to fall improperly and hurt themselves badly. Again, letting them gain the spatial awareness with the mattress on the floor will help prevent them falling from their eventual big-kid bed when they jump on it, possibly preventing a concussion. They probably will jump on the bed at some point, no matter how much you admonish them not to do so.

A toddler bed, a frame to hold the crib mattress, is really a waste of money and time and only necessary for someone wanting to keep the "look" of the child's room. Even with transition cribs, if the side is off and the mattress is as low as possible, it is still likely that the child will fall out or off a few times, from a greater height than just the mattress on the floor.

Once your child reaches 2 years, s/he can transition up onto a twin bed with no issue, having most likely gained the spatial awareness necessary to remain on it during sleep. If your child continues to wake up on the floor while down on the crib mattress, however, bed rails, or a pool noodle tucked under the fitted sheet on the sides of the bed, may be necessary to provide a boundary.

Family Bed Transition

This also is a good idea if you are trying to get your toddler out of YOUR bed. It is an easier, gentler, kinder way to do it than just kicking them down the hall. Getting a new bed, that smells, feels, and sleeps VERY differently; in a new environment, which, even if they play in their room regularly, it is TOTALLY different at night, with different sounds, light/shadows, and smells; without the heartbeat and warmth and comfort of the person/people they have ALWAYS been surrounded with at night, is traumatizing to a toddler.

Imagine if your spouse told you that you need to sleep in the guest room from now on because you disturbed their sleep. They helped move you into the guest room, talking about how great this was going to be for YOU. You lay there at night, not comfortable with the bed, listening to how the house sounds different in this room, how it smells different. You miss your spouse's warmth and smell and gentle snores. You feel like you are in a foreign land. You wonder if your spouse will change their mind tomorrow and let you back into YOUR bed. Surely they won't kick you out if you slip back in there, or if you let them know how much it means to you to sleep with them every night, to feel that closeness and connection. You feel lonely, abandoned, rejected, sad, unloved, unappreciated. You are an adult and you feel all these things even though you have some understanding of the reasons behind the request and life experience with which to relate similar experiences in a rational manner. It hurts. 

Now imagine what your toddler feels like when it happens.

Think about how much you LOVE your bed, dislike sleeping on others when you travel, or how long it takes for you to become accustomed to a new mattress. UGH! The same is true for your child, and they don't understand it. You don't like changing beds, they don't either, and your bed is most likely the only one they've ever known.

Once the decision is made to remove your child from your bed, it must be a firm decision, and your child must not be allowed back into your bed. If you do, then it's just mean, because it will be on YOUR terms and just jerking your child around, which s/he doesn't understand. Make a rule and stick with it. Vacillating back and forth on ANY issue...you can be in my bed tonight...you CAN'T be in my bed tonight...you can be in my bed tonight...you can nap on the couch today..., especially something like this that deals with your child's connection and access to YOU, just makes children uncertain, stressed, fearful, and distrustful. Consistency allows them to trust that, "This is the way it is." They won't like it at first, of course, because it's YOU who is making that decision FOR THEM to remove them from THEIR BED to a new one, but they will quickly understand that, "This is the way it is." Period. And they will adjust accordingly. Just not happily. 

The crib mattress can begin to be used at nap time. Once your child seems comfortable napping on it, which may take a while, place the crib mattress next to your bed for their "special spot" at night.  

If you are eventually trying to get them into their own room, once they adjust well to sleeping on the mattress at night, gradually move the mattress a little farther away from your bed and toward their room each night, allowing for extra nights if you hit a transition period where the child balks. Never move it back toward your bed, but just keep it in the same position for a few nights. It will eventually reach the hall, and eventually reach their room, and eventually reach the place in their room that you want it be. Make sure that gates are up and hallway doors are shut and/or childproofed with handle guards so your child only has access to their bed location and your room if they get up at night, which they most likely will during this transition. Just consistently place them back on the crib mattress with calm reassurance. Every. Single. Time.

Breaking from this even one time gives your child hope and expanded possibilities. They will run with it, and the transition will be much harder and longer the second time around, and exponentially thereafter. 
Tags: toddler, infant, bed, transition, family, removing, transitioning, crib, bassinet, playpen, pack-n-play, child, care, daycare, crib to bed transition, toddler bed, own room, son, daughter, boy, girl, parent, parenting, discipline, gentle, easy,